Alright, I know that I have verbose and have rhapsodized about this movie or that movie to appear all scholarly and shit. ¿Verdad? Right. Well, I sometimes get carried away by the sound of my own keyboard. Not today. This is a stripped down, no-nonsense, fist to the face style posting about movies that kick ass. If my other post have been Rush, this is Motorhead, motherfucker.
Hard Boiled (1992)
Is there any movie that is as ridiculously over-the-top in the action category as Hard Boiled? I mean, seriously, Chow Yun-Fat slides down a hand rail shooting two guns that never seem to run out of bullets. The shootout in the chop shop? Insane. Does the plot make sense? Does it matter?
The main cop’s name is Tequila, for fuck’s sake!
The bad guys have their secret hideout in a hospital!
I can’t take it. This is one of the ultimate “just don’t thin about it, dude” movies.
Ong-bak (2003)
There’s a whole “thing” happening with martial arts films from Thailand right now. This Chocolate and Raging Phoenix are taking the Hong Kong Wing Chun style of wire-fighting made famous in the U.S. through flicks like The Matrix and grounding them. Tony Jaa doesn’t fly through the air except for the leap to put his elbow right into somebody’s head. This movie was one of the most cringing movie experiences I’ve ever had. I watched most of the movie going “Ow, oh geez, ouch, shit.” I was amazed at the stunt work. Like, fuck man, there must have been so many concussions on that set. I mean, I’m sure there wasn’t because they’re all professionals and shit, but still. Jeez, just thinking about it.
The Matrix (1999)
Speaking of being drained for your electrical energy by robots, I still get a kick out of this movie. I am not nearly as anti-sequel as some 
other people are about The Matrix, but I didn’t enjoy them nearly as much. Even with Monica Belluci in them. The last one was just laughable (which is what we did when we caught it in the theater, loudly and with many hysterical fits that ended in “Oh my God, this is great.” Even though it wasn’t.) but it finished the story up in a completely what the fuck way, which is fine with me. The first one was all “You’ve lost the game by thinking about the game” kind of deep while adding kung-fu, slow-motion, and a shit load of bullets. Yes, slow-motion was a tool.They brought a gun to the book club meeting and I loved it. Cornel West (whom I think is a genius) was one of the “Council of Zion” members in the sequels and did the commentary for the movie on the giant 10-disc (or something) box set of the whole series. We have one at work and if it’s still there in 8 paychecks, I’ll get it. Maybe. Probably not.
The Wild Bunch (1969)
I just love Westerns in general. The Searchers, Once Upon A Time In The West, Unforgiven, Silverado, The Good, The Bad, & The Ugly, True Grit, The Proposition (which, by the way, makes for a horrible date night movie- you live, you learn),Rio Bravo…any of those could go here, but I love The Wild Bunch because of the beginning shootout (a standout of editing – you can be forgiven if you think you see one of the bandits take a shotgun blast to the face, you don’t though) and the final bloodbath. As William Holden and Ernest Borgnine mow down the Mexican Army with a machine gun, the Wild West comes to a close. These two relics of a time that has all but been extinguished by progress fight to their last breaths because they valued standing up for what was right more than they valued their own lives. And as they begin to lose, taking bullets left at right, Ernest Borgnine screaming “Give ‘em hell,Pike!” the orgy of blood comes to a close with a rifle shot fired from a kid no older than 12. A barrage of bullets cut through Bill Holden and as ol’ Ernest dies besides his best friend, he whispers “Pike…Pike” before the West is finally lost..fuck,man. That movie is bad-ass.
These are just some of the great action films that I would call my favorites. Also on this list is the great Scott Pilgrim vs. The World (which will show up later on in the 30 days), Deep Rising, Hot Fuzz, Speed Racer, Watchmen (again, we’ll get to that later), Hunt For Red October, Iron Man, Inception, Dark Knight, and, I guess, a dozen more.
